Right now, I’m sitting in bed with my laptop on my lap preparing to write an email response to a clients questions. I just grabbed a pillow to prop up under my laptop. The pillow is my old one from years ago that I grabbed from my parents house a few weeks back. There’s no cover on it yet, it has just been hanging out next to my bed for the time being.
Anyway, as I got all settled to write the email, I looked closer at my pillow. It’s covered in tear marks.
Stained from my mascara, dark water circles…all over. Immediately, all these memories come rushing to my mind of when I believed I would be nothing in this world. I would cry daily. Bury my head in my pillow under the covers because I couldn’t handle the thought of letting the world see me.
For years, I believed I would always be unhappy, stuck, ‘a nothing’. I had convinced myself that my life would consist of pulling myself out of bed daily, ‘just getting by’ and crying myself to sleep.
I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. What happened, is the exact opposite.
I finally had gotten SO SICK of who I was. SO SICK of ‘just getting by’. SO SICK of being sad all the time, and worried, and feeling worthless. SO SICK of hiding, playing small, and SO SICK of believing I wouldn’t be who I was supposed to be.
I had to get THAT angry with who I was in order to get THAT serious about who I would become.
No, it wasn’t easy. It was HARD to re-program my brain and FORCE myself to believe in ME for once. But it was possible. I’ve spent YEARS putting my mindset FIRST, training myself to be better daily. All of this to say it’s a HUGE reason of why I was trained in Transformational Coaching and use many of those techniques with my clients. Because I lived it and I KNOW the power of transforming the mind.
Without the mindset work, I’d still be covering my pillows in tears.
Don’t ever let your mind win at telling you that you can’t do something. Fear runs our brain until we SHOW it a reason not to.
STEP INTO YOUR TRUEST SELF! Because the world needs to know that person.
xo Amy Jo